ALERT

[bigbadjack]

 Reports are coming in of an outrageous robbery in the Lakeside area of Doncaster this afternoon. Sometime between 3:00pm and 4:45pm a group of individuals known as 'Sheffield Utd FC' used shameful tactics to steal 2 points from under the very noses of the good knights of League 1 football, Doncaster Rovers FC. Among the appalling tactics on display were play acting as if been shot, attempting to get opposition players booked or sent off and diving in an attempt to gain unfair penalities. Unconfirmed reports also state that the referee may have been involved, alternitavely he could simply have been a spineless tw*t. Law enforcement agencies have asked for members of the public to be vigiliant but to report any sightings of people wearing shirts with vertical red & white lines who sing songs about greasy chip butties and supping Wards bitter. It is understood that the club known as 'Sheffield Utd FC' also have acute delusions of grandeur due to them winning the FA cup approximately 100 years ago when players wore hobnail boots and the cross bars were made of gaffer tape. Please dont approach them in an attempt to discuss football related matters as they will simply role out the old line that 'we're a bigger club than Donny' which is simply short for 'we used to be famous once'!
Before anyone gets their knickers in a twist, I jest of course. A great derby game and good to see two South Yorks teams flying high. Lets hope Leeds come down the other way!

[redmist]

That was brilliant until the last 3 lines.

[redmist]

Of course I do want Leeds down though.

[Scooter]

Bigbadjack - if only you had written like that at school you might have sneaked some GCSE's
 

[adge]

in music or religious studies maybe