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Viking Chat => Viking Chat => Topic started by: BillyStubbsTears on March 08, 2010, 01:44:57 pm

Title: Andrex Charity Appeal
Post by: BillyStubbsTears on March 08, 2010, 01:44:57 pm
Spare a few coppers to buy some bog roll for our cousins at Elland Road? Their arses are getting particularly claggy at the moment as they contemplate their imminent fall from the automatic promotion places. Look at the in-form opponents they have coming up over the next few weeks.

Tomorrow they play away at a resurgent Tranmere, a much stronger unit since Barnes left - they have only lost 4 of their last 16 matches.

After that, they play
Southampton (A) (13 wins and 6 draws in the last 23)
Millwall (H)(8 wins and 2 draws in the last 11)
Norwich (A) (18 wins and 2 draws in the last 22)
Swindon (H) (12 wins and 5 draws in the last 19)

They then have four or five (on paper) easier matches, before finishing against Charlton and Heffernan's Bristol Rovers. Oh the sublime beauty of a last-minute Heffs winner that confined Leeds to the play-offs...

Please give generously. You wouldn't want a poor Leeds fan to shit himself now would you?
Title: Re:Andrex Charity Appeal
Post by: Snods Shinpad 2 on March 08, 2010, 02:26:28 pm
BillyStubbsTears wrote:
Quote
Oh the sublime beauty of a last-minute Heffs winner that confined Leeds to the play-offs..


Now that would be a thing to behold. Bristol Rovers are still capable of Play Off spot too. Rovers should let Heffs stay there until his contract is out, but insert clauses giving us bonuses if they get in the Play Offs and/or get promoted. It's the only way we'll make any cash out Heffs now and BRFC will be desperate to keep hold of him.

If L**ds fook it up this year they'll be looking at 20% drops in attendance, as the glory hunters give up hope and refuse to pay £30 to watch them get beaten at home by Rochdale.  :laugh:
Title: Re:Andrex Charity Appeal
Post by: BillyStubbsTears on March 22, 2010, 11:46:59 pm
Any spare change my friend?

There's some sloppy ring pieces to wipe in West Yorkshire. A veritable tsunami of clag threatens to engulf LS11 unless YOU dig deep to avert a humanitarian disaster.
Title: Re:Andrex Charity Appeal
Post by: Lytham Rover on March 23, 2010, 09:10:08 am
wouldnt a andrex/kleenex appeal be better

all the better for the \"crying game\" :laugh:
Title: Re:Andrex Charity Appeal
Post by: BillyStubbsTears on March 27, 2010, 11:44:26 pm
Somebody? Anybody?












You heartless bas**rds.
Title: Re:Andrex Charity Appeal
Post by: Goldthorpe Rover on March 27, 2010, 11:49:32 pm
Toilet paper for their arses and a box of tissues for their tears...nice
Title: Re:Andrex Charity Appeal
Post by: RobTheRover on March 28, 2010, 08:17:31 am
I've got a job lot of Izal in the garage.  Any good?
Title: Re:Andrex Charity Appeal
Post by: BillyStubbsTears on March 28, 2010, 11:40:32 am
RobTheRover wrote:
Quote
I've got a job lot of Izal in the garage.  Any good?


Very kind of you Guv'nor. It might scratch their nethers but beggars can't be choosers in an emergency like this.
Title: Re:Andrex Charity Appeal
Post by: RobTheRover on March 29, 2010, 03:01:38 am
Izal surely was the work of a complete sadist.  Not one element of absorbency, but as a shit spreading device it was unsurpassed.
Title: Re:Andrex Charity Appeal
Post by: Donnybob on March 29, 2010, 08:47:01 am
How perfectly symetrical.

Your creditors receive a fraction of the money they think they're entitled to and now Leeds receive a fraction of the points they feel they are so deserving of, for just turning up...

Awww. Who's crying now, baby?

Leeds shouldn't rule out automatic promotion just yet but with Southampton on the kind of unstoppable roll they're on, they could be nailed on certs for a Wembley double in May. Better secure that runner's-up spot Grayson or your job might depend on it.

SOD for next Leeds manager?
Title: Re:Andrex Charity Appeal
Post by: BillyStubbsTears on March 29, 2010, 09:47:19 am
Nah. I've seen the script. Heffernan winner on the last day of the season puts both Bristol Rovers and  Leeds in the play offs, and he repeats the act at Wembley to clinch promotion for Bristol Rovers.
Title: Re:Andrex Charity Appeal
Post by: Lytham Rover on March 29, 2010, 01:37:29 pm
somebody better tell leeds to give up now................oh dear they already have :laugh:    ;)   :laugh:
Title: Re:Andrex Charity Appeal
Post by: Snods Shinpad 2 on April 03, 2010, 05:45:08 pm
Update:

Due to the recent deterioration in the situation at Elland Road, we would urge people to donate as many of these as possible, as even our supply of triple ply super absorbent tissue is no longer useful in this crisis...

 (http://www.drfc-vsc.co.uk/media/kunena/attachments/legacy/images/DisplayImage.jpeg)