Jokes

[Pintolager]

Teacher asks the kids in class, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Billy says " I wanna be a billionaire, have a beautiful bitch on my arm, give her a Ferrari, an apartment in Copacabarna, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel the world, a 200ft yacht, an infinite visa card and I wanna shag her 3 times a day....."
The Teacher, in shock, ignores the boy and turns to little Nancy and asks, "What about you dear?"
"I wanna be Billy's bitch!"


An 11 year old realised that she started to grow hair in between her legs. She got worried and asked her mum about the hair. Her mum calmly said "That part where the hair has grown is called a monkey, be proud that your monkey has grown hair"
Next morning, at breakfast she told her sister "My monkey has grown hair." Her sister smiled and said "That's nothing! mine is already eating bananas."
Her mum fainted.
 

[The Red Baron]

I don't think I'd send them to Roy Hodgson, if I was you. 

[not on facebook]

Two flys in a airlng cupboard.

How do you know which fly is in the army?

The one sat on the tank.


What did the Frog say When he saw the pegion taking his book
Back to the libary?

Red-it.....red-it.....red-it.....

[SoundbiteBarmyArmy]

I was out on't lash with my Welsh mate once, towards the end of the night he asked if we could go into the pole dancing club of the window he was staring into, that's a kebab shop I replied.