VUVUZELAS

[nice one rovers]

No, he's not our next rumoured striker signing, what do you think, any chance of us all buying one  (they're on'tinternet for a couple of quid)    & filling the Keepmoat with noise seeing as we're crap singers.It'd freak the opposition out if we do it to them before everyone gets one and does it to us.

[Shornton]

They'd sound better than that drum!!!!

[nice one rovers]

Shornton wrote:

They'd sound better than that drum!!!!

Hey, that's mean! But thinking about it, with the drum AND our vuvuzela's, we'd be a regular band!! COME ON, I'm ordering mine now.

[nightporter]

I'll go with annoying. :angry:  More annoying than that f**kwit at Portsmouth with the bell. :angry:  :angry:  Best result ever them getting relegated now I don't have to listen to that on TV constantly.

[Wellred]

Hope he doesn't take the bell to away games then!

[RedRover45]

nightporter wrote:

I'll go with annoying. :angry:  More annoying than that fcukwit at Portsmouth with the bell. :angry:  :angry:  Best result ever them getting relegated now I don't have to listen to that on TV constantly.

  No, you'll get to hear him live instead, and Im guessing Pompey will be on TV nearly as many times as Newcastle were  

[ScillyRover]

I assume by 'Vuvuzelas' you mean those infuriating bits of tubular plastic that are supposed to resemble a trumpet !.
I know I'm a grumpy 'ol git and old fashioned but I think those bloody things are dreadful and through their presence, stand to ruin the enjoyment of the competition.
I've just started watching the RSA v Mexico game and thought my telly had either developed an acute incurable audio fault or that a swarm of mutant virile bees had entered my lounge and couldn't find a way out. Even my cat's ears were twitching like the clappers. They've ruined the first half hour's experience of listening to the game, so much so that I've turned the audio off !!.
Can we please go back to the days of rattles, cheers, boos, verbal critisism and praise at games !.
My old 'Air Raid Precaution' rattle was hard on the ears but pure music compared to those decibel busting Vuvuzela gadgets !!
     

[BillyStubbsTears]

The domestic violence figures will go through the roof over the next month. Ale, sun, England getting pasted and 4 weeks of that fcuking God-awful racket and even Jesus Christ Almighty would kick seven shades of shite out of his nearest and dearest if they upset him.

[Filo]

Sick of hearing the f**kers already, i'll not be watching many games if that noise continues! :angry:

[Donnywolf]

... a WIN WIN situation is turn off the sound and you not only lose them annoying fcukkers b(such as Beglin) but also the vuvuzelas as well

[DMnumber4]

I don't think it's as loud for the France game. Maybe because there's not 70,000 South Africans in there.

I've heard USA are bringing some cheerleaders tomorrow, so it's all good  

[JonWallsend]

BillyStubbsTears wrote:

The domestic violence figures will go through the roof over the next month. Ale, sun, England getting pasted and 4 weeks of that fcuking God-awful racket and even Jesus Christ Almighty would kick seven shades of shite out of his nearest and dearest if they upset him.

Northumberland or Durham constabulary, can't remember which, have supposedly been visiting all those known to them with a history of domestic violence, in their area, in the past weeks, as part of campaign for the very reason that the crime increases quite markedly during these major tournaments- and that's without factoring in the trumpet thingy racket.

[5minstogo]

I was walking up Thorne Road in town earlier and some clown scared the cack out of me by blowing one of these things. They are even louder in person. So after I had scraped the shat from my boxers I promptly shoved his trumpet up his arse. Well, I should have.

[RobTheRover]

DMnumber4 wrote:

I've heard USA are bringing some cheerleaders tomorrow, so it's all good  

I've blown a cheerleader.  They make a similar noise to a vuvuzela?

[BillyStubbsTears]

JonWallsend wrote:

BillyStubbsTears wrote:

The domestic violence figures will go through the roof over the next month. Ale, sun, England getting pasted and 4 weeks of that fcuking God-awful racket and even Jesus Christ Almighty would kick seven shades of shite out of his nearest and dearest if they upset him.

Northumberland or Durham constabulary, can't remember which, have supposedly been visiting all those known to them with a history of domestic violence, in their area, in the past weeks, as part of campaign for the very reason that the crime increases quite markedly during these major tournaments- and that's without factoring in the trumpet thingy racket.

Actually, I've seen the original paper that the Plod took the data from to justify these claims that domestic violence goes up when the World Cup is on. These claims are b*llocks. The paper pointed out that on two of the Saturdays that England played during the last World Cup, reported cases of domestic violence were higher than at any other time that summer. However, the authors themselves point out that the highest peak in their entire survey was on a Bank Holiday Monday the year before, when no major sporting events were occuring. They have no explanation for this. Nor for the fact that on other days when England played, the incidences of domestic violence were lower than the average for those days.

All in all, it was pretty poor stats masquerading as serious research. Which is a shame, because if there was one depressing message really coming out of the figures the paper showed, it was the huge spikes in domestic violence every single Friday and Saturday of the year. It lays bare a really upsetting picture of inadequate t**ts getting hammered then going home and laying one on their wife or kids. It's our collective inability to handle ale and anger that's the problem - football has little to do with it.

[BillyStubbsTears]

RobTheRover wrote:

DMnumber4 wrote:

I've heard USA are bringing some cheerleaders tomorrow, so it's all good  

I've blown a cheerleader.  They make a similar noise to a vuvuzela?

Aye, fair point. The matches today sounded like 90 minute long fanny farts.

In the middle of a swarm of mosquitos.

With a hundred Vespas riding round.

Christ, there's no wonder the murder rate is so high in South Africa. I wonder if the Coroners have a stamp that says, \"Internal injuries due to insertion of Vuvuzela up the nethers\" to save them having to write it out on the death certificates?

[JonWallsend]

Not doubting that Billy, although ale and anger are a recurrent theme when you follow England at a tounament so it could tie in, but then again those Bank Holiday Monday traffic jams aren't good for the stress levels.

It is an inability to handle drink and emotions. Most people react to England failing at a major tournament with an air of resignation. Others start trouble in the streets or go home and vent their anger at someone else.

Most worrying as you say according to the report, is that this is commonplace, for some people, on a Friday and Saturday night and if the police campaign at least highlights this fact and makes people more aware of it, then it can't be a bad thing even if the data on which it's based is spurious.

need to edit- Due to BST posting again before I could submit this post, the opening line now reads as though I concur, all too readily, with his theories on South African autopsies.

[ScillyRover]

Re: The racket... My missus just came out with a good one whilst I was watching Fr v Urg .....
\"As if watching? football was'nt torture enough\"

 

[RobTheRover]

Actually, its comments like that which increase the domestic violence stats. ;-)

[ScillyRover]

RobTheRover wrote:

Actually, its comments like that which increase the domestic violence stats. ;-)

 


Yeah, to avoid becoming a statistic I'm getting out of the house tomorrow and watching it in the pub without her.
Just hoping the pub landlord has the volume turned down.

[BillyStubbsTears]

JonWallsend wrote:

Not doubting that Billy, although ale and anger are a recurrent theme when you follow England at a tounament so it could tie in, but then again those Bank Holiday Monday traffic jams aren't good for the stress levels.

It is an inability to handle drink and emotions. Most people react to England failing at a major tournament with an air of resignation. Others start trouble in the streets or go home and vent their anger at someone else.

Most worrying as you say according to the report, is that this is commonplace, for some people, on a Friday and Saturday night and if the police campaign at least highlights this fact and makes people more aware of it, then it can't be a bad thing even if the data on which it's based is spurious.

need to edit- Due to BST posting again before I could submit this post, the opening line now reads as though I concur, all too readily, with his theories on South African autopsies.

You're right Jon that more people get tanked up when England are playing. I was in the Northern General in Sheffield overnight with an antibiotic drip in me arm the night England played Croatia in Euro2004. Coming up to 9-10pm, the nurses were running round like blue arsed flies, clearing the ward for the influx of broken heads, glassings, kickings etc. And when they started coming in, the trail of smashed up bodies went on for 3 or 4 hours. Pissed up, f**ked up low-life puking up on the ward, cursing the staff who were trying to sort them out, shouting and bawling all night. I got up for a piss in the middle of the night and it was like a scene from Florence Nightingale's hospital in the Crimean War. Every chair, every bed, every corner filled with somebody with stitched-up or bandaged-up wounds.

And England won 4-2 that night...I wonder what it was like the night they lost to Portugal?

[nice one rovers]

So, are we all getting some VUVUZELAS then, I'm not sure on which side opinion lies.
   

[CusworthRovers]

Bust ups with the Mrs can start so easily though boys.

I remember last time England played in the world cup. I came in from the pub and said to Mrs CR 'Right Sexy, up them stairs now'. She looked at me and said 'Oooh you kinky bugger' I said 'No seriously, up the fcukin stairs, England kick off in 5 minutes, now fcuk off'

[Old Popsider]

Bloody things, had to turn the tv volume right down. They're going to spoil the whole event for me.

By the way, having nowt better to do, I've rearranged the letters and come up with 'SAVE ZULU' with a V left over. Now, what to do with a spare V...................

[The Red Baron]

Being serious for a moment, it seems that these infernal things can damage your hearing:

http://www.rnid.org.uk/mediacentre/press/2010/?ciid=354280

So, if I should insert one of these up the rectum of the person blowing it, can I claim I was acting in self-defence?

I hope no-one even thinks of bringing a Vuvuzela within a hundred miles of the KMS!

[topnotch_Donny]

I wonder if England fans will be able to sing over the dreadful noise, tonight?

[Filo]

STOP VUVUZELA`S!

[DRFC MYERS]

ive just got myself one off ebay :D

[topnotch_Donny]

DRFC MYERS wrote:

ive just got myself one off ebay :D

Hope you don't sit near me  :angry:

[Filo]

topnotch_Donny wrote:

DRFC MYERS wrote:

ive just got myself one off ebay :D

Hope you don't sit near me  :angry:

Or me, unless you like large objects like Vuvuzela`s shoving up your arse!