Mondegreens

[Bentley Bullet]

More Than A Woman (Bee Gees)

"Bald-Headed Woman"

[i_ateallthepies]

Chiquitita tell me what's wrong (Abba)

"Take your teeth out tell me what's wrong'

[Pancho Regan]

Chicken Tikka tell me what's wrong ...

[Bentley Bullet]

https://youtu.be/iQ2xtFDvHTU?si=pcy0jbrTM5HTGCAZ

[NickDRFC]

Carly Simon - You’re So Vain

“Well you’re where you should be all the time
And when you’re not, you’re with
Some underworld spy
Or the wife of a postman, wife of a postman”

[scawsby steve]

"My heart will go on" - Celine Dion.

"I believe that the hotdogs go on".

[belton rover]

Des ‘ree, ‘Life’:

‘I don't want to see a ghost
It's a sight that I fear most
I'd rather have a piece of toast’

Oh hang on, they’re the actual lyrics.

[drfchound]

ABBA, from Super Trouper
“When I called you last night from Tesco”

[Bentley Bullet]

Constant Craving
K D Lang
Can't stand gravy

[Donnywolf]

Carly Simon - You’re So Vain

“Well you’re where you should be all the time
And when you’re not, you’re with
Some underworld spy
Or the wife of a postman, wife of a postman”

Your hat strategically dipped below one eye
Your scar plate was African

That was my " version " till last year when I finally looked it up and saw " your Scarf it was Apricot"

I could fill a book with such " gems " like that , irrational and completely wrong

[drfchound]

Carly Simon - You’re So Vain

“Well you’re where you should be all the time
And when you’re not, you’re with
Some underworld spy
Or the wife of a postman, wife of a postman”

Your hat strategically dipped below one eye
Your scar plate was African

That was my " version " till last year when I finally looked it up and saw " your Scarf it was Apricot"

I could fill a book with such " gems " like that , irrational and completely wrong

Yep, the scarf version was what I always sang too Wolfie.

[Donnywolf]

My most irrational one , with no relationship with common sense must be ...

Caught in a lemon land , rather than bad romance

[RobTheRover]

Frank Turner - Josephine.

You come as a cock rash, I'll come as James Dean.

[ravenrover]

Rosemary combed her hair and took a cabbage into town - Bob Dylan. I eventually found out it was carriage not cabbage

[Bentley Bullet]

Macy Gray - I Try

I wore goggles when you are not here

(My world crumbles when you are not near)

[IDM]

Shania Twain "That don't impress me much"..

"I can't believe you kiss your car goodnight" sounds exactly like "I can't believe you kiss your cock at night"..

[Bentley Bullet]

https://www.facebook.com/reel/817153480487648

[Donnywolf]

I said previously , I've got hundreds. I often sit in Car when Mrs Wolfie nips in shop for "one or two bits" and listed to Radio with Google ready to get lyrics of whatever comes on

You should be dancing BGs exposed my former lyrics

Chain reaction

You took a vegetable and put me on it was a beauty but I still sing that anyway

Next time I'll be pulling through .... Not as sensible as Next time I'll be bulletproof

[Filo]

Brotherhood of Man

“We’re having kippers for tea”

[Bentley Bullet]

I notice there's been one or two ABBA inclusions in this thread. I wonder if their often-misheard lyrics were down to them playing their instruments extremely loudly.

They played at Bentley Park once and you could hear the drums from Nando's.

[Darren]

 I had a girlfriend that i heard singing along to When i'm sixty four, she was singing When i'm six feet four, and it took some convincing that she was hearing it wrong.

[Pancho Regan]

Monkees' Daydream Believer:

"Oh how could I beat the wings
Of the Bluebird as she sings"

40 years I was singing that before I found out the correct words.
And I still sing the wrong ones.

[Dutch Uncle]

My wife was a natural talent for Mondegreens - the best of the lot was 'the warm smell of policemen' from Hotel California. Belfast girls must have a thing about policemen.

BTW, love the word Mondegreen and the story behind it (from 'the Bonnie Earl o' Moray'). I used to call them 'illyrics' until I discovered that word. 

[Hounslowrover]

Showing my age, but I think it was the Dave Clark Five with Glad All Over. I used to sing “take your clothes off now” for “because we’re close now”.

[belton rover]

Brotherhood of Man

“We’re having kippers for tea”

Supertramp

‘Could we have kisses for breakfast?’

[glosterred]

Have a laugh

https://x.com/BestOfUKComedy/status/1473056213961220096

[Bentley Bullet]

https://www.facebook.com/reel/491938733614181

[Pancho Regan]

Not exactly a mis-heard song lyric but this thread brings a smile to my face for a similar reason.

I started bringing my youngest daughter to the Rovers when she was just four years old. I bought her a season ticket which I renewed every season until this one when she turned 18.

We live a 2 hour drive from Donny so on the journey home after the match I would put Radio Sheffield on the car radio.

As soon as we started the journey my daughter would say “put Raisin Crumble on Dad”

[IDM]

Peabo Bryson and Roberta Flack “tonight I sellotape my glove to you..”

[Petche]

"Chelsea, turning snakes into the sea"

Mr Brightside yeah? Well that's what I've been singing all these years!